Self Marriage

Self-marriage, also known as sologamy, is an important practice within Interconnectionism; combining the ritualistic pattern of both our fellowship's baptisms and weddings, self-marriage is a defining point in our fellowship. Whereas our fellowship's baptisms are a ceremony dedicating oneself to the fellowship and weddings are between two people, sologamy ceremonies are meant to [re]affirm one's own personal values, claim their independence, assure they will take self-responsibility, and put their trust wholly into themselves.

As with most every Interconnectionist ceremony, rite and ritual, there is a "Path to Sologamy" class leading up to the ceremony itself to ensure this is something that is right for you, and to help explain what this ceremony is and what it will look like when it is all played out. With that having been said, here are a few key points regarding our sologamous ceremony: 

• Our sologamy ritual is for anyone who desires it (not just women) 
• While sologamy is often seen as a rite of passage into adulthood or into the teen years within our fellowship, there is no age limit regarding the ritual; so long as the sologamous-to-be full understands the process and is able to complete the "Path to Sologamy" course work they can undergo a self-marriage
• Being married to yourself does not mean you cannot undergo a baptism in the future, nor does it prevent you from being married to another person. It is merely a declaration you will stand up for yourself, believe in yourself, and be true to yourself (among many other important aspects) 
• You do not have to be already baptized into the fellowship to undergo an Interconnectionist self-marriage ceremony
• The sologamous-to-be (the one who will be married to oneself) does not have to wear white; in fact, they are encouraged to wear anything that represents nature in some way, and/or that they feel beautiful in 
• The alter and aisle do not have to be solely white; in fact, it is greatly encouraged the sologamous-to-be plans their self-wedding as they might any other wedding, or even their dream wedding
• The actual sologomous act--that is, marrying the person to themselves--is completed by a minister (or the praeminister) at an altar
• The sologamous ceremony is short and takes place in an entire day 
• The longest part of the sologamous ceremony is for the person undergoing the ceremony to complete the course work before hand in addition to building the hika
• The reading of the self-vows aloud is entirely an independent decision. They may instead be placed upon the altar
• The altar is not a perfect standing circle; instead it is called a "hika"; it is self-constructed and rectangular design, created by the person undergoing the ceremony from nature-based materials. The only other person who can help them create the hika is the person who will perform the ceremony itself (see our Facebook page > Photos for current ideas on how to craft the hika)
• Sometimes an individual wishes to choose another name for themselves other than their birth name. This will have to be delivered to the minister overseeing the ceremony prior to the ceremony itself

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